Life has been throwing me some hoops lately.

And little by little, I’m figuring out what is and is not aligned…

 

Take this post for example.

 This is something I would have previously just written on my blog.

But life’s been leading me to also post on Facebook.

 

I don’t know what that means for me.

I’m not sure what it means for the future.

What I do know is my website will stay active.

I will still post all of my blog posts here as well.

But life is shifting for me — and I’m here for it.

 

In 2022, when I started my healing journey,I had no idea where life was taking me.

I just knew anything was better than where I was headed.

 

My physical pain had reached a height I didn’t understand.

I was in the worst depression of my life.

And I would have done anything to escape this world.

 

I’d be lying if I told you I don’t still have those days.

 

But they hit different now — because I know deep down it’s not really what I want.

It’s relief.

 

Somewhere along the road, my intentions shifted.

I went from wanting to escape the world to wanting to find peace and safety within myself.

 

And that’s hard to do when you have chronic pain.

When you feel like your body is fighting against you.

When your body literally becomes the enemy.

 

How do you learn to love what feels abusive?

I don’t have the answer to that — because I don’t love it, 

and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.

 

What I did learn to love… is myself, despite the pain.

I started cutting myself some slack for all the things I have no control over — like my pain.

 

I may not be able to make it go away.

I may not always be able to lessen the pain.

But I learned to love myself through it.

 

I slowed down and listened to my body more.

I stopped trying to fix what wasn’t broken.

I’m learning what works and what doesn’t.

 

You see, disabilities aren’t some joy ride

.It’s not some extra-long vacation from work.

It’s waking up and fighting for your life every day.

 

It’s being shamed and looked down on.

It’s being told to “just go back to work.”

It’s being made to feel like you’re less than.

 

But you’re not less than.

 

And neither am I.

 

If anything, I’d say we’re pretty freaking brave.

Because despite the pain — we choose to stay.

Each. And every. Day.

 

If this resonated, I’d love to know — what helps you keep going on the hard days? 💖